just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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