she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
