Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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