I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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