I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
