i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I deserve this hangover.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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