Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
