I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
zippers are such a cool invention
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
