Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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