I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
