I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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