I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
