I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
