He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
