3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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