Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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