i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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