Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
ugly people sure do ruin things
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
my god I love twenty year old dicks
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
