Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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