he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Randomize
