I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
