please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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