Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
it glows. i had to have it.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Randomize
