I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Randomize
