she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize