I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
