Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
