Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
