She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
How's work?
Spinning.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
