At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize