Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
