Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
