There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize