arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I FOUND THE LEGS
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
