...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
