I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize