Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
