i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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