i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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