How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
