watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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