We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I just want nice things and good sex
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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