One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
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