Walk of Shame. In a state park.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
