Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
