He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize