I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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