Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize