May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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