idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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